This, That... And Another Thing, Honey!

Good Morning Daaaarlings!

Alas, we are a mere four days away from our Phoenix, AZ debut at Zorfs and things couldn't be more hectic around here!  It's the time when the band house go completely to hell with n'ary a surface clear of glitter, sequins, feathers, ribbons, costumes and, thanks to the guys, empty beer bottles and other weird things.  A quick glance around reveals a panorama of absurdity -- a neon orange hard hat, a hot pink inflatable microphone, a baton, a giant rhinestone "B"... it's as if this place is the photographic backdrop for a find-the- hidden-object game!  And then there's this weird dog...

But enough of that!

Big doings in Phoenix coming up, starting with Freaky Friday at Zorfs, hosted by none other than the illustrious Celia Putty...

... Followed by the very special Be Dazzled Show on Saturday, Aug. 31st (ignore the date on the image... the show is so great they're  going back!)...

And finally, rounding off the Labor Day Weekend gala a Zorfs is Billy Dare & The Pumps on Sunday, September 1st...

And Another Thing, Honey...

Get ready for the September 7th launch of Junk Drawer, the latest CD Baby release by Billy Dare & The Pumps, featuring the hit single, Mean Girl.  If you haven't heard Mean Girl yet, you can download it for free with a quick click.  Download Mean Girl Free!

Lo and behold, Dolls, there is much to do, so...

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxoxo

Miss Billy Monthly Horoscopes For The Fabulous!

Alas Daaaarlings,

As you are all positively fabulous, it seems a dreadful shame that you would have to read those dreary and dry newspaper horoscopes to lean your fate.  After all, who cares what's in the stars?  You, dear ones, ARE the stars!  Therefore, by request, I present to you, Miss Billy"s Monthly Horoscopes For The Fabulous.  Enjoy!


CANCER (June 22 to July 22)  Horror turns to happiness when that set of missing dentures you find on the bus leads you to your soul mate.  Try a bunion regulator to put an end to that agonizing foot pain.

LEO (July 23 to August 23)  You are shocked and angered when a quick check of your neighbor’s pantry reveals the location of your missing Tupperware lids.  Try a dash of Tabasco to liven up that ho-hum deviled egg recipe.

VIRGO (August 24 to September 22)  You are tickled pink when you find a valuable cents-off coupon in your neighbor’s mailbox.  Co-workers are agog at your profound ability to coordinate autumn colors.

LIBRA (September 23 to October 23)  You squeal with joy upon learning the object of your affections shares your love for oldies radio.  Poo-poo those late night chip and dip binges if you plan on wearing that fabulous new thong.

SCORPIO (October 24 to November 22)  You suddenly find yourself overwhelmed with the desire to have your eyebrow pierced, but change your mind and buy that festive croquet set instead.  Acquaintances secretly marvel over the secret of your minty fresh breath.

SAGITTARIUS (November 23 to December 21)  You find yourself angered and confused when you find a man’s toupee in the backseat of your mate’s vehicle.  Nix those bulky briefs when strutting  your sexy new hot-pants.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 20)  Jealous tongues wag when your potato salad takes first prize at the annual lodge barbecue.  An elderly cab driver asks your advice on lactose intolerance.

AQUARIUS (January 21 to February 18)  You become miffed when well-meaning neighbors and a Kitty Carlyle look-a-like give you unwanted financial advice.  The office gang just can’t stop talking about your versatility with rubber.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20)  You become a bit baffled when a croupier asks you to hold his stick.  Try experimenting with various lunch meat condiments to add zing to your potluck supper offerings.

ARIES (March 21 to April 20)  A full-figured woman with acrylic nails points you in the direction of true passion this coming season. Your crock-pot creations are all the rage among the A-listers of your set.

TAURUS (April 21 to May 21)  You chortle with glee when a one-eyed slot attendant reveals her secret for silky smooth elbows and knees. Friends and relatives secretly envy your spotless stemware.

GEMINI (May 22 to June 21)  Finances improve when you check the seat cushions of a relative’s sofa at an upcoming family gathering.  A spritz of medicated powder should clear up that pesky rash in no time.

Until next time,

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxoxo

Hey Dolls!

Just a quickie...

In Just 3 Days... Red Hot Sizzling Pool Party at the Chicken Ranch Brothel... free BBQ, contests, games. etc... and a special show with Billy Dare & The Pumps. It all starts at 1pm, with Billy Dare & The Pumps at 3pm. This event is open to the public, so join us at The Chicken Ranch, 10511 Homestead Rd., Pahrump, NV on Saturday, August 17, 2013!

Message me for details... Hope to see you there!

Stay Fab!

Miss Billy xoxoxo

Daaaarlings!

Lots happening at the Billy Dare & The Pumps camp these days!  Aside from trying to keep the pool from turning green in the blistering Las Vegas heat, we have extraordinary shows and fabulous events on the horizon.

Sizzling Red Hot Pool Party at The Chicken Ranch!

Coming up in a mere ten days is our gig at The Chicken Ranch, a legal brothel in Pahrump, NV.  Ah, but it is true dolls, Billy Dare & The Pumps will be performing at the ranch's, "Sizzling Red Hot Pool Party." on Saturday, August 17th. The event runs from 1 - 6 pm and we will go on around 3 pm.  And, of course, Crazy Jay from The Rocking Comedy Radio Show will be there!

This year's party will feature a carnival theme with a free, all-you-can-eat BBQ, teams, raffles, competitions and even the, "You Sexy Thing Male Dance Competition!"  So guys,  Click Here To Enter.

Meanwhile, the girls of the ranch will be there to ensure you have a fabulous time, while The Marty Rodick Sports Talk Radio Show will be broadcasting 'LIVE' from the CR - Listen on KSHP 1400 AM 

Now, sweet ones, I have never actually been to The Chicken Ranch, but judging by the website and what I've been told, I expect it to be positively fun and totally wild!  And the good news is YOU are invited!  There's even a chance The Chicken Ranch will send a free, round trip party bus to pick you up, drive you to Pahrump and return you to Las Vegas if there is enough interest.  So if you'd like to join us on the 17th, be sure let me know.  Remember, it's only 10 days away! 

So How Much Pizza Can You Eat?

On Friday, August 23rd, Billy Dare & The Pumps will be at The Rocking Comedy Show Pizza Eating Challenge at   Naked City Pizza inside Moondoggies Bar on 3249 S. Arville St., Las Vegas, NV.  The event runs from 3 pm until 6 pm.  While we won't be competing in the contest, we will definitely be there to support Crazy Jay and participate in the live, remote podcast.  

Celebrity judges will include   Paul Shortino from Raiding The Rock Vault, Rough Cutt, and Quiet Riot. Hypnotist Kevin Lepine, Celebrity Magician Murray Sawchuck and from MTV,  Ricardo Laguna. 

Put your own pizza eating team together, or just come down and join in the fun.  Details can be found at The Rocking Comedy Show Pizza Eating Challenge.

Join Us Labor Day Weekend In Phoenix

Write this down, Sweet Peas!  ZORFS on Indian School Road in Phoenix will be the place to be over Labor Day Weekend.  Kicking off the weekend will be the wonderful Celia Putty (photo below of Celia by Vicious Photography) on Friday, August 30th.

Then on Saturday get your entertainment fix with the popular troupe, Be Dazzled, followed on Sunday, August 31st, by Billy Dare & The Pumps.  I believe all shows start at 9 pm, but check in with ZORFS for particulars.

And Finally....

A couple more events coming up include the Billy Dare & The Pumps' CD Baby launch party for Junk Drawer and the 2nd Annual Pet Pride hosted by ZORFS in Phoenix on October 5th.  Check back for details!

Until next time...

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxoxo

How About A Labor Day Get-Away In Phoenix, Dolls?

Daaaarlings!

I just received a copy of the ad for Billy Dare & The Pumps upcoming show at ZORFS in Phoenix, AZ on Sunday, September 1st and since I positively adore it, I thought I'd share it with you.

Honestly, baby-dolls, I am so excited about this show.  For starters, it is going to be the very first time I play Phoenix, so I absolutely have no idea what to expect. What's even more spectacular is I get to see my friend John (a.k.a Jake, Kaitlyn, etc) who I haven't set eyes on in at least a decade!  We used to do shows together at The Front Runner in Manchester, NH (and other places) when he performed with The Ross Express as Kaitlyn Ross with the ever-fabulous Misty Ross.

Alas, precious ones, the photo below is one of the few that exist of gals of The Ross Express and I -- and one I cherish (even though, oh woe, I'd just gotten off stage and look all hot, sweaty and disheveled). Less than a year into our career, Billy Dare & The Pumps had just played a date at a club in Portsmouth, NH and the delicious Ross divas turned out to cheer us on.  After the show we were invited to a magnificently posh gala at a nearby restaurant where this photo was taken.  Shown here are:  Misty Ross, myself and Kaitlyn Ross, who I will be seeing in Phoenix!!!  If only Misty could be there as well!

So, cupcakes, anybody who plans to be in Phoenix over Labor Day Weekend 2013, head over to ZORFS!  There will be plenty to do -- the amazing Celia Putty on Friday, Be Dazzled on Saturday, Billy Dare & The Pumps on Sunday (all at ZORFS) and for all you baseball fans, the Arizona Diamondbacks will be playing at home.  So start planning your fabulously festive Labor Day get-away, dolls.  I'll see you at ZORFS!

As Always, Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxoxo

Are We All Listening To The Same Song??? MEAN GIRL Feedback All Over The Place!

Daaaarlings!

It's been just over a month since we offered a free download of Billy Dare & The Pumps' sassy new single, MEAN GIRL, and the response has been nothing short of amazing!  But the absolute strangest thing, sweet peas, is the feedback. It is positively beyond me how so many people can hear so many different things in one song!

For starters, MEAN GIRL, has been compared to Katy Perry, Taylor Swift and even Lady GaGa, which I can sort of understand... but Justin Bieiber?  Whoa babies!  I didn't see that one coming!  And while there have been numerous comparisons to 80's "girl groups," the Jackson Browne tie-in kind of threw me for a loop.  And let's not forget Paramour -- specifically Still Into You -- a review which I can agree with to, at least, some extent.  But Justin Bieber?  Are we listening to the same song?

I guess what it comes down to, baby dolls, is it doesn't really matter who or what MEAN GIRL sounds like as long as people are listening to it and, fortunately for me, loving it.  Yet of all the feedback received on MEAN GIRL, my absolute favorite came from Crazy Jay of the Rocking Comedy Show who said, "It's A Hit!"

Anyway angels, thanks so much for all your feedback!  And for those of you who haven't downloaded MEAN GIRL yet, grab it FREE -- Just Click Here!

Stay Fabulous, Dolls!

Miss Billy xoxoxo

Rocking Comedy, Fireball Whiskey and Billy Dare & The Pumps Un-Doing!

Daaaarlings!

Talk about Cocktail Chatter, we couldn't shut the hell up during yesterday's appearance on the Rocking Comedy Show with Crazy Jay Bird.  And while it's true Billy Dare & The Pumps are, indeed, a chatty bunch, add a half dozen or so shots of Fireball Whiskey to the mix and look out!  The Rocking Comedy Show, the #1 podcast in Las Vegas, turned into a frat party!

Now precious ones, I must admit, I don't think we played our songs as well as we could have -- but we sure had a positively divine time trying!  I suppose I could go and listen to the archived version at Rocking Comedy Show, but I don't think I dare.  Perhaps you could go and listen, then report back to me where I currently stand on the Humiliate-O-Meter!  It's episode #341.

But seriously, cupcakes, I do recall some bizarre events, such as:

• When I accidentally called Crazy Jay, LAZY JAY, much to the delight of Jay's co-host, Spazz.

• When I accidentally called co-host Spazz, SNATCH, much to the delight of Crazy Jay.

• When Spazz kept calling the guys Blondie (Todd), Baldy (Mikey), The Jew (Bernie), The Guy From Colorado (Bobby) and You, which is me.  Of course, who am I to judge anybody for forgetting peoples names?  Just ask Snatch and Lazy Jay.

• When (lucky for me) Mikey kept stealing my shots of Fireball Whiskey (which turned out not-so-lucky for Mikey).

• When this weird little dog wearing a red spiked collar started biting a very large tortoise in the head -- maybe I imagined that.

All I can say, Dolls, is it was tons of fun in a hazy, intoxicated way.  Unfortunately, since the episode is archived, it will go on my permanent record for the rest of my life.  Whatever happened to, What Happens In Vegas, Stays In Vegas????  Until next time, sweet-peas,

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxo

P.S.  If you haven't done so already, download your free copy of MEAN GIRL, the sassy, new single by Billy Dare & The Pumps --  GRAB IT NOW!

Positively No Right Way!

Daaarlings!

Alas I have discovered that boredom can sometimes lead to great revelation. Finding myself with absolutely nothing to do -- all my nearby friends are dreadfully hungover following last night's St. Patrick's Day gala -- I decided to dabble about on Facebook.  Lo and behold, my delightful little shamrocks, what I discovered was a positively fascinating fabric of diversity.

From six to sixty, gay to straight, atheist to christian, republican to democrat, black to white, to male to female to transgendered and all beings and beliefs that could exist under the proverbial rainbow, the one thing all these Facebook friends have in common is they are my friends. 

To me they do not represent their gender or age, their religious beliefs or political platforms, their successes or failures -- to me they are, like you,  just a bunch of amazingly awesome, diverse and passionate people. And while I may or may not share their backgrounds or align to all or any of their beliefs, what I absolutely believe in is, well... THEM! 

Alas, precious ones, I have come to realize there is positively no single right way to be or to believe.  We need not agree with each other to appreciate each other... just be grateful for the diversity.

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy xoxoxoxoxo
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Just A Quickie!

Hey Dolls,

I know it has been positively forever since I've posted on this blog, but that is all about to change.  Rather than recap all the dreadfully dull and deliciously delightful events that have occurred over the past five years, let's just start this party again.

Yes I am still writing songs, still performing and, oh woe cupcakes, still dieting... I've been 25 pounds lighter and 12 pounds heavier than today... so nothing really changes in my little yo-yo dieting world.  The band has, however, changed.  For the past few years we've had an awesome new, five piece, line-up.  Of course, Todd is still playing guitar and Mikey Pump is still on bass, but we've added a second guitarist, Bernie Hamburger who adds some wonderful flavor to our older, stripped down style.  Also, we have the amazing Bobby Bryant on drums -- very creative with tons of finesse.  

I would write more, but the truth is I am shamefully boring today and am in dire need of a pedicure.... dire!  

With that said, my little angel-babies, I must run... that sounds so absurd... but dooooo check back in the next week or so for more posts. Until then...

Stay Fabulous!

Miss Billy
xoxoxoxo